BTALD: Toothpaste Factorial

It seems that someone learned factorials at the toothpaste factory - you know, the maximum number of combinations that you can make with a given number of choices. So they took all the different things toothpaste can apparently do, like whitening, and tartar control, and sensitivity, and sensitive tartar control, and tartar whitening, and control of sensitive tartar, and...

Well, now we all get to stand there and stare at all the boxes and try to figure out what we want our toothpaste to do. Then there's the flavor question. So, I am wondering -- are there certain toothpaste features that are BAD for certain people? I mean, this is the only reason I can think of why you wouldn't want to just offer all the toothpaste options, all the time. Maybe some people have a weird reaction to tooth whitening? Or the sensitivity stuff causes you to become weepy or something?

I mean, with mouthwash, they could just make the labeling a LOT more clear. There's Gross, and then there's Gross with Flavor, and then there's Burn Your Mouth Off, and then there's Gross but Pretty Color.

I just with that if they were going to offer all these options with toothpaste, they could throw in the stuff they do for kids too. Like, they could put glitter in it. That would make my decision a lot easier.

BTALD: 100 calories of what?

What a great idea, putting little 100-calorie packages of food together. I mean, you can just grab em and you know what you're getting, and that's really cool. Except, whenever I'm at the store I look at those things, and they're all - well, gross. Like, 100 calories of weird little Oreo-like cookie things shaped like parts of a soccer ball. Or, 100 calories of strange fig bar things with sprinkles on them. What is this stuff? I mean, could you do 100 calories of something recognizable? Maybe I'm shopping at weird stores.
I know, 100-calorie packages of hummus. That would be neat.
I realize that if you did 100-calorie packages of foods we usually eat for snacks, it would get pretty ugly - I mean, 5 crackers or a piece of bread or a single chip in a package is not going to work. The reality of it would be hilarious and sad at the same time.
But I have to say, I do love the "eat crap and still lose weight" idea that our food industry seems so bent on selling. They make so dang much money off this stuff. Putting a little sign in the 100-calorie snack shelf that says "go pick out an apricot or apple" would lose some big important business people lots of money.
But soon, it will stop raining and we can all go outside and run around and then calories won't matter so much.